Blackmoor Vituperative

As I am looking at the auditions for the second season of Who Wants to Be a Superhero?, a few of things have become apparent:

1) Most aspiring supers desperately need help with their costumes.

2) Most aspiring supers are doughy guys with guts bigger than mine.

3) Of the few aspiring female supers, most are doughy gals with guts bigger than mine.

4) Something about being near a wrestling ring makes people think they need to shout to be heard, even though they are speaking into a microphone.

5) A lot of people are unclear on the distinction between “super hero” and “renaissance fair volunteer” (huzzah!).

Here are my picks of the best from the auditions currently online. It’s hard picking good ones, because, well, most of them are just really, really bad (and not in a good way). Even these are just sort of okay, and not really good.

American Angel
Elementas
Fire Ant
Jetstream
Mama Voodoo and Wyld Cat
Midnight Wolf
Omnicron
Optimyst

I thought about listing a few of the worst, but I started to feel sorry for them, so you’ll have to find the bad ones on your own. Maybe I am getting soft-hearted in my old age.